Reflections after Completing the First Marathon

Dear Novi Woods Staff, Students, and Community,

Well, we made it.  We made it to the weekend--the end of the first week of our 2020-2021 school year in which the world is still gripped in a global pandemic due to the Covid-19 crisis, and I've never been more proud of our school.  To be clear, I have NEVER-in my now more than 25+ years in our district-been more proud of our school and our school community.  

I'm proud of our students who have inspired the adults to be better and do more than we probably thought we ever could.  You are why we do what we do.  

I'm proud of and grateful to our parents for being so understanding and supportive of the many new details, my many miscommunications, and for raising remarkable young people.  Your patience with me and us has held me up in more ways than you will ever know.

And, of course, I'm proud of our staff.  I am not speechless very often, but many non-educators might not fully understand what our staff has undertaken this week.  To say they have moved mountains is not an exaggeration, and the entire Novi Woods staff has done it with grace and professionalism.  In fact, I am more than proud of our staff.  I am humbled.

Still, my emotions are raw.  I know what it took for us to make it to this weekend, and I am worried how many more weeks we have to go until this crisis is over.  Oh, I've read the social media posts.  We can and will "reinvent" ourselves.  We can and will use this experience to "reimagine" education.  We can and will focus on the positives (and there are many) to better address systemic issues in our schools.  Yes, I believe we can and we will.  In fact, we are.

Still, my emotions are raw.  In the last four days I taught 28 "leadership" chats to each of the classes in my school.  Eighteen were in person, and 10 were virtual.  I also spent a full day subbing for a virtual teacher who had a family emergency.  My staff tells me how much they appreciate me visiting their classes--in person and virtual.  My staff knows I do not just lead from my office.  That's just not the way our school works.  We are a team in our school which means we are vulnerable and open with each other.  We share the best and worst with each other.  We hold each other up through struggles and celebrate victories together.  This week, the struggles seemed to outweigh the victories, but we kept going.

Still, my emotions are raw.  They are raw because everything--I mean EVERYTHING--takes more energy and time to accomplish.  Something as simple as morning announcements, visiting a classroom, or passing out or collecting activities has become an ordeal.  They're raw because I know I am asking our staff and students to do so much more than just these "simple" tasks, and I don't feel like I have been a great principal for anyone this week.  Yet, I am in awe of the progress our students made over the last four days with their ability to persevere and learn in this environment.

Still, my emotions are raw.  My emotions are raw because I had three colleagues call me at night this week in tears.  They didn't know if they could keep going.  (They did keep going, and they are inspirational.)  A student cried in front of me--over the computer--because I was not able to properly help him manage the newness of learning virtually.  (I visited his house at the same time his teacher was talking with his parent after school.  He inspired me to keep going.).  I have listened to teachers this week and have felt their pain, anguish, and sheer emotional and physical exhaustion.   I have received multiple emails from respected educators with phrases like "we're drowning."  I broke down--thankfully at home (God bless my wife.)--this week due to managing my own emotions.

And then something happened...  My teachers started an email chain early on Saturday morning.  Here are some excerpts from three different staff members.

The number of times students get dropped by the internet is astounding.  Their frustration for missing something is tremendous. Admitting them back into zoom, showing and explaining the activity again for them, (this happens dozens of times a day) all while troubleshooting all the above scenarios, made me want to crawl in a hole and hide.  The only thing that kept me sane was that most of the students experiencing this remained calm. Many of these kids are resilient and it was beautiful to see.   I couldn't fall apart in front of them.

 

...the emails that I have received from parents sharing their children’s excitement to wake up and want to go to school the next day is extremely uplifting. I have already received many thank yous and had one of my students waiting outside the school yesterday in hopes of getting to meet her teacher in person. These are the little things that are keeping me going and motivated and remind me of what an amazing community we teach in. 

 

It is an indescribable experience of ... panic, joy, perseverance, ingenuity, humor, EXHAUSTION, humility, creativity, a sense of loneliness (yet under 50 sets of eyes), ENDLESS clicking-clicking-clicking-clicking, burning blurry eyes, a sense of loss, a sense of hope, a sense new possibilities, and a true test of my calling to teach, to care, to keep trying, and to default to the one true goal...to love my new students.

Yes, our emotions are raw.  This year has just begun.  Each of us knows teaching and learning are more a marathon than a sprint.  What it took to get to this first weekend has already felt like a marathon.  It's not what any of us want, and I know it's not ideal.  But we did "finish" the first marathon--the first week, and we are stronger and wiser because of it.  There will be more bumps and bruises.  We will stumble.  But we will keep going, and we will complete the next week.  We will keep moving.  We will keep going, and we will complete the week after that.  We are on on our way--together, and I truly am humbled and honored to be principal at Novi Woods Elementary School.

Sincerely,

Mr. Ascher