Everyone is Working on Something

Everyone is working on something.

This seems like a rather simple statement, but I’ve recently tried to see this through my students’ eyes.  Let me explain.

Teachers and principals have many opportunities to watch and even help kids take risks and learn something new.  Like many schools, we have students who have learning disabilities or who are learning how to speak English.  Of course, we have students who are quick to master a new concept, and we have students who struggle to learn new concepts.  Each of these students is taking risks and pushing themselves farther than they had originally expected.  Fortunately, we have supports in place to help all of our students be successful. 

I’m not convinced, however, that our students see all adults as learners.  There seems to be an unwritten rule in schools that adults know the answers.  In fact, I would suggest that same unwritten rule is shared in families.  Adults are wise.  We know what’s best.  It’s easier to do what we say.  Unfortunately, I think many students believe the “road” to this wisdom to simply “growing up” rather than learning, hard work, and effort.

Do adults take risks?  Do we share our frustration in appropriate ways?  Do we ask for help when we need it?  Do we even admit when we make mistakes or are working to overcome an obstacle?  All of our students are asked to do these steps almost every day.

I’ve found over the years that modeling what we expect others to do is one of the best teaching strategies.  It sends a message to our learners that we understand, we are working to become better, we are always trying, we are persevering.

And so I need to model my efforts and frustrations...

I stutter.  I am a stutterer.

I’ve stuttered since I learned to talk.  I don’t know why, and I wish I did not, but I stutter.  It’s embarrassing.

I was inspired to share this when I read a column in the Detroit Free Press about Cameron Francek, a stutterer who is undertaking a remarkable project to face his challenges.  Please read it here.

My family knows I stutter.  My closest colleagues know I stutter.  Most people who listen closely to me recognize I stammer through words, close my eyes at some phrases, and repeat some words in sentences.  Until recently, I did not discuss it.  Stuttering was a frustration for me, and I can't control it.  I chose not to discuss stuttering because my only experiences were when people would make fun of me.  Now, I have learned to joke about it, but I still have people mention it in unflattering ways.  (Occasionally, people still make fun of it. Maybe this is silly of me, but I prefer to be the one who initiates the conversation or joke about my stuttering.  My laughter helps me cope.) Talking on the phone or even in public are no longer fears for me, but I never quite know what’s going to come out of my mouth when I begin to talk.  I’ve been able to develop strategies to overcome stuttering, and I can’t think of a time that it’s held me back.  I reach out to speech therapists, but it’s usually an offer to talk with any of our students or their parents who may be stutterers.  Sometimes I share with a child or their family that I stutter.  Usually this student is struggling to improve their learning or their behavior.  I try to keep my stuttering private, but I’ve learned to use it as a “tool” to help others know that I am persevering.  I am working on something…  Everyone is working on something.

Enough about me.  I did not begin this blog or this entry to write about me, and I don’t plan to change how I share my stutter at school.  Rather, I wonder what our students would think about learning, pushing themselves, and persevering, if the adults in their lives actively articulated how they push themselves and how they are learning?  Are adults sharing how they pick themselves up and persevere?  I’m not saying we need to recount every mistake we ever made and preach about effort.  Instead, I believe it’s important to share out loud how you are working to overcome being late or procrastinating.  It’s OK to discuss how you are tackling a project or how to learn a new computer program at work.  It’s OK to share how you are learning.

So, take a risk.  Share your journey.  Let your kids know that the “road” to wisdom is paved with mistakes and effort.  Let them know your “adult” wisdom did not happen by accident.  You are wise because you have and you are working…working on something.